OMFG EMILY HURRY UP AND GET YU BLOODAYE REPORTS. farrrrrrk. even tho i got okay.. is my reports i feel like a failure. i dont know why but i used to be so good at science. tho ive never came in top 10 before? that dsnt matter. last year i was such a smart ass. and this year i feel so dumb. idk whether its because i dont remember from preuni opr whatever but im not showing off :( IT DSNT FEEL NICE TO LEARN. jksjks lol. well. http://fodmn.blogspot.com/ for results.

today was pretty ordinary. emily catrina and i skipped english to do stuff at the hall, like set up for parent teacher night. and at lunch, it was pretty cool. POKEMONNN. we all love the old one. we talked about almost every pokemon and how cool and cute they were x]x]. i cant believe that no one, including myself, didnt know who/what bulbasaur evolved into :(, i have the pic in my head but i cant get the name!. omg :(

True Blood made me so sick. god its so. HARDCORE YOU KNOW?. omfg. apart from the doing, its pretty okay. but omg the next ep comes out in september ==;.

Also, the topic of teenage love came up in some way shape or form, i know it. and if it didnt, well this is just a random rant. i reckon its bs. how can little teenagers, start liking someone, then ask them out and the words 'i love you' come out of their little mouths and actually mean it? they probably dont know that person much, or they might, but still, they could like fully on alot, but not love. there is a difference. and little people are too stupid to understand the difference. like coleen and kevin ahve been going our for like 9 months or so, and everyones like omg thats a long time and shit. and she goes i know aye. and i ask her, are yu gna marry him, then she says no. like bro they say i love you to each toher eveyday and she expects them to not be togetehr forever. and omg the word forever. its so clichaed and over-ly used. like a couple can say i will love you forever, and they next month or so they break up. its pretty stupid, how teenagers say all these things they dont mean, and they think that they are fully on hurt now because they think they 'love' the other person, but they dont even know what its like to go out and break up as an adult.

and i made it very boring.

i dont feel like doing homework, tho i have finished almost all of it. i dont feel like psing. i dont feel like drawing. i dont feel like singing. i dont feel like guitaring. i dont know why i dont feel like doing all these things. i am so bored. i have 62 people on and yet, im talking to none of them. i wonder if dirk and isaiahs on stickam. i feel so, depressed? or maybe im just tried. i did do beep test and swim and soccer today. i dont get how i am making myself and actually cramming all different kinds of bullshit into my life. i need a break, im having one and im bored. maybe ill watch some tv.

6.2, new record. tho ive only done beep test for the first time last year. this is my second time. at pools today we threw and caught juns goggles, without that freaky old fat man there. its always so fun (:. we then stopped and played t or d. huynh sed he dsnt know much about me, lol i guess i dont tell many people alot about my life. its boring anyways. so that led to 20 questions. they wanted to know so much but they could only come up with 2 questions, i expanded it to 100000000 questions and they still didnt know where to start. noobs x].

do you wonder what death will be like? will it be like those sterotypical scenes we see in movies and things? is it all black? is there such a thing as heaven? hell? are there such things as ghosts and will we become one? one thing i know for sure is, i will eternally live. as potiential energy :D. in science ms majd sed that energy can never die or go away. it is just converted. will i live the rest of my death as a skeleton full of poitential energy? maybe i will be reincarnated. AS A FROG!!!!!!!!!

kung fu panda also taught us many things. there are no accidents, if yu actually think about it there are no accidents, or there are accidents but that has a different meaning do the kung fu accident. if yu think about it, say i bump into someone 'accidentally' that isnt an accident, i bumped into them because i wasnt looking, or i was walking backwards, i wasnt paying attention. cause and effect. everything happens for a reason. then theres a i broke the nice plates 'accidentally'. that accident, you caused harm in some way but you did not mean to.

THERE IS NO CHARGE FOR AWESOMENESS.

i always hear people say 'i will wait for you forever' or something along those lines. its pretty weird, the thought of someone waiting for someone to like the back just so they can be a couple for a few months then like die or break up. its pretty stupid when you think about it. it might just be that one guy waiting for that girl to like him back, if she dsnt hell die lonely living his life watching her with other guys. dat is going to wait for wynee for the rest of his highschool life? he likes her but she would choose a 7th grader over him, a 7th grader who broke her heart and wouldnt have the guts to tell her face to face that he lost feelings for her or something along those lines. i think ive made a mess of my life, waiting for that one girl, guy, giy x], its pretty stupid, i would just wait day after day until there was a little sign that would raise my hopes but time has passed and now i dont feel that way, i like hayley now (: ive always like hayley :D. when i see her im gna rape her but then shell like it so it wont be a rape itll be hot sex :D. the idea of waiting is just stupid.

speaking of hot sex. lipstick jungle. its pretty okay..., i cannot decided whether it is better then gossip girl or not, its only a 7 episode season. which is pretty crap. kirby atwood or something is hot 8} nort even. he looks like that guy thats playing edward in twilight AHAHAHAH. i bet he would make a better edward, kirby. but the best edward would be gaspard ulliel (: hes so .danny =D yeh lol dono will cum his pants watching it. but i dont think hell like it.

today i read dannys blog and there will be an asteriod the size of earth that will hit earth in 2036 on friday the 13th. i dont kow which month or whether there are 2 firday the 13ths and if there is which one. but according to danny scientists are gna build a rocket and destroy it or someshit. if not the asteroid will destroy half of earth, it will cause damage 50 times worse the horishima. in other words more then 1 city will be evaporated or destroied. the remaining population with still die from the lack of sunlight, because no sun no food chain. so theyll eiher die of starvation or the lack of vitamin D. but there is a slim chance that that will happen. so before we turn 41/44 we are going to create box 9 lame i know but it will be just like dirk mais box 8, just the enxt generation. i will be dirk danny is isaiah and dalena is sara x]. i want to do photography.

i better get it as an elective. but i dont know what my other one should be... help me out. i am stuck between 3 choices, and i have reasons for and against that subject.

should i pick music? i want to learn more and maybe become a musican, ill have fun and ill learn alot, i will use the right side of my brain, it contributes alot fo my uai. but i can always teach myself, or someone else can teach me, am i going to waste an elective?

should i pick drama? i like it, its fun, it improves many of my skills that i lack and am very bad at. i learn to talk louder, to build my confidence, to raise my self esteem amybe?. but i dont really see myself as an actor, it dsnt contribute much to uai.

should i pick va? painting and drawing that is. i want to be creative, this is a great way to learn, ive always liked painting, it uses the right side of my brain contributes alot fo uai. i dont see myself as an artist, but a graphic designer or photographer but that still needs some creativeness. i cant draw really good, i might come last in my whole class.

danny said va. but i need your opinion too.

so fars its in this order

1 photography
2 va
3 music
4 drama

do yu want to change this? what do yu think will benefit me most?

not much is alright. i broke my clay yesterday. 4 weeks of hard work for nothing. i have to re do it and the teacher made the base so small. but im going pretty quick. almost beating lyanna. i finished my history paper. did all my homework besides... english storyboard? lol this thing on my desktop is really motivating me. lol.

i need new clothes so badly. i want the elwood hoodie from cabra, its so nice ahahahaha. i also want a gabes hoodie. what i need tho is like a new shirt or soemthing? lol yes i need a few shirts and i want the elwood and gabe hoodies (:. i am going to make me dad buy me clothes, from cabra and maybe from parra or something. im dling and its gloing so fast lol. kung fu panda and you dont mess with the zohan betetr be good. if it is ill talk tokevin all day about it ahahahaha.

Happy 1 year iHayley.bebo.com!

my approach at doing my homework when i get it is going... okay? i havent done it yet but thats just preuni work, i dont really need to do it now, i just catched up on my other work i ahvent finished OMG I NEED A SONNET. anyways,, yeh ive done all my homework. i thought the geo assignment was gna take so long, but half the assignment wasnt even on the actual people, like climate of that country/region? i researched the country. and the threats i just copied some shit out of my book. i left it to the end and it was easy. maybe its the thought of leaving it to the end will it be hard. but oh well. im half way therough my history paper. omfg i just found more eng hw. STUPID MF!!!!!!!!! ill copy @ recess :L.

danny vexelled isaiah so nicely. I HATE HIM :(. i want to be just like him one day. the creative him. not the annoying stupif self centered idiot him (:. i want to watch shutter so badly :( might watch it next week, and then when we go back to dalz house we'll watch untracable. ahaha. im not gna be able to sleep soon x]. speaking so sleep. it is past my time i go to bed time. my bed time when i fall asleep time is usually anywhere between 11-3. i have unusual sleeping patterns. they mgiht not even be a pattern.

ART TOMORRROW YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.

i wonder what were gna do.

i finished my clay and emilys almost finished hers. no one else to help?

hey yall x].

my nets been stuffing up and i have a geo assignment due soon. its working now and yet im not doing it.

i remember saying that i will do all my homework i recieved that day straight after i come home from school. i have failed to do that. only sometimes i would do my homework straight away. other times i would just do it at night or not do it at all. just saying it back then wasnt enough motivation for me to continue doing it now. sometimes the thought of it slips out of my mind.

last week i was dced for 4 days 23 hrs and 11 mins aprox. during that time, i felt that i had no net so i couldnt complete my homework. i had piles of maths to do and i didnt because i kept thinking i had no net so there is no possible way to do it. i had my text book. after about 2 days during that dc i just did my homework like i was supposed to. it was actually kinda fun. i was so bored all afternoon and i wouldnt do it before. i know i couldnt do all my homework, but i did most of it.

i dced last night till like an half an hour ago. when i came home today i did all my maths and science pretty quickly. i was quite proud of myself for doing all my homework and i found it quite easy. i bet if i left it any longer or to the last mintue i couldve found it really hard when its not.

i was looking through my things when i did all my homework and i found this bookmark my year 6 teachers gave me as a graduation present.

Believe in yourself, and remember that anything is possible.
Believe in what makes you feel good
and what makes you happy.
Believe in the dreams you've always
wanted to come true, and give them
every chance to.
If you are willing to take the
opportunities you are given and
utilize the abilities you have, you will
constantly fill your life with special
moments and unforgettable times.
No one knows the mysteries of life or
it's ultimate meaning, but for those
who are willing to believe in their
dreams and in themselves, life is a
precious gift in which anything is
possible.

                                                              Dena Dilaconi.

i now have this stuck next to my quick desicion pamphlet. whenever i look at it, it will remind me when im down or when i feel like a failure that i can still achive what i want to. so i wrote my own poem or whatever these things are called that will remind me to do my homework.

Things are easier
when they are done straight away.
dont leave homework or assignments
to the last minute.
do then near the time you get them
not near the time when its due.
youll remember more
from what yu learnt in class.
the work wont seem difficult.

                                                                                                                fodmn.

im hoping these three things will help me throughout my highschool life.
so i can achieve what i want, so i know i can get through my downs and have a lot of ups and to make highschool feel like a breeze when if comes to assesment taks or assignments.

i hate it.

when people ask for something and theyre only saying please or thank you because they reckon its a way to make someone do that particular favour for them. if what they asked for cant be done then get all ==; and TT; and all that bullshit. i am the one who is doing the favour and its not my fault i cant do it. sometimes the sources arent there. its not my fault. if its not there now then i doubt itll be there in another 52389578375873 millions years. so fucken leave me alone and keep all this ==; TT; bs to yourself. if yu truely want something then you wouldnt go ==; try next time. like its a demand. your asking a favour. you would go aww i really want it or something like that. i dont have everything in the world just because i do this. ive been far too nice before. i admit its my fault for saying, i can do anything because i have this and that. but even tho i tell yu that when i sed that i was exaggerating and i really only get most or even some things, you still expect it to be delievered to you. thinking giving me things or like 'paying' is gonna make me do something is wrong. you dont have to pay me or anything. but yu cant expect it if yu are willing to.

our generation is so fucked. we are all spoilt children. we know too many things far beyond our age knowledge. we expect so many things.

since when was marijuana or cocain even legal in our country? and yet 15 year olds are taking it. since when is it okay for 13 year olds to have sex? since when is it okay for 5 years olds to know what the meaning of 'fuck' and 'shit' is and frequently use it?

ive heard many stories of all these teenagers 'doing it' 'wanking' 'masturbating' 'sexing x]'.
why are we all so desperate for sex? why is everyone acting/being all "gangtsa".  why do we all want to be like eminem or 50 cent?. in real life they arent even ganga. they just rap and write about it in their songs. i remember back in the days when i was 7 or 8 and my sister just went into highschool, all her friends and herself were all scared swear. if they ever heard someone cuss, they would go dob. they wouldnt say the word fuck until they got into the 9th grade or something. i was infulenced by my surroundings, it was also my own choice to swear. now my little 6 year old neighbour says fuck once a day, and if he dsnt use it in a sentence, he just says it out for fun.

our generation is just like those sterotypical highschools in america. each table would be like nerds and geeks, sluts, football players, goths/emos, not so much smart but not skanky or like those build stupid guys kinda like normal people, and loners. but instead of  having that many groups it is divided up into 3 groups kinda like this gangsters inc. wannabes, hard kunts; nerds geeks; cool normal people who dont fit into those categories like me (H).

try hards and hard kunts do whatever they can to fit in or seem 'gangsta'. their 'friends' make them do all these things and they make that person suffer peer pressure. those hard kunts swear as frequently as they can, like the word fuck in every sentence that comes out of their mouth. some just go around picking on little kids, or asking people to fight them just to show how strong they are. theyre happy when they get in trouble cause they think it makes them look cool, they make it seem like they wanted to and theyre not scared of the teacher or their parent or something but inside theyre fully on scared. they turn hardcore. they drink more then they can hadle when theyre not even legal yet. they smoke and flood their lungs with metals and chemicals just to look gangsta when inside it feels horrible. they feel if they dont take drugs they wont fit in, so its kinda like theyre forced to destroy their whole body system.

all my friends are so horny, myself inculded i guess. they talk about sex everyday, they wonder what ti feels like, they might even give themself a handjob or finger themself. this little boy in year 7 was caught giving himself a handjob or 'wanking' like emily says, why would he do it at school? why dsnt he do it at home and then he can ahve all the privacy he wants and he can take as long as he can. this girl in my grade chucked a vibrating toy under, between, her legs and made it vibrate, she took a kmart magazine which was opened to the mens undies section and put the piture of a naked mans undies to her mouth. these people from bonny or bosley were having a threesome, which they recorded, and now everyone has this porn, it was 2 guys and one girl, they were doggy styling while the girl was giving the toher guy a blow job and touching his balls. someone i know got his girlfriend who is 3-4 years older then him, pregnant, shes keeping the baby and dropping out of school. this girl got naked and started creaming herself and fingering herself just to impress a guy, why would a guy be impressed by that? wouldnt he want to be the one fingering or the one like up there?

our generation is so fucked up.

today we had preuni. it was so boring.

- hiptop/sidekick
- madina lake
- erics rabbit shit
- inspiration
- someone like dalena
- she was pretty good at it
- for my english poem
- lol
- actual cds of albums
- even tho i already have them
- i would still like the real thing
- bop n beep
- ice bat
- basically all uglydolls
- (:
- that elwood hoodie from cabra LOL

inspiration.

i lack it so much.

right now i dont know how to live my life.
ive heard far too many quotes of different things yu need to do before yu die. i dont even know which would benefit/make me happy more. i am watching too many movies about thugs and office people and hippies. some people live their lives with happiness. not planning anything. just letting the good come to them. some people live a life of meaning. they plan almost everything. they know what they want and will try their best to get it. they will do whatever they can to. people study till they fall asleep at their desk just so they can have a good paying job. money is what they live for. they study hard now so later on they will have the money to buy their own happiness. others just live life doing what they want but not studying 24/7. these people dont care about what they do, what they might become. they dont care about other peoples opinions they just do what they love. just like a rebel. if they dont care there is no stopping them. they can achive anything even if a person is putting them down and saying bad things. but if they dont care someone might be giving them good advice and they would still ignore it and their lives can be completly destroied.

i want to live my life like all those three things. i want to be happy. i dont want to study. but i want a good job in the future. not to earn a fortune but just enough for some extra luxaries. i wanna reach my goal without taking in what people are criticising about me.

but if i want a good job to support myself, i have to plan. if i plan how am i supposed to obtain the happiness i desperately need? how can i go about life not caring when i need to study, when peoples opinions do matter sometimes.

if i live my life not caring, sure when i plummit to the ground i wont care, but i would prolly starve to death, i want to live as long as i can. i want to do as many news things as i can. if i explore new things i can be happy. but if i live a life of happiness, what will i do while waiting for all the happy things to come to me? i need to stay occupied otherwise id get bored and i wont be happy. i need to plan. how else am i going to get through my highschool life and the future? having money is pretty cool. but later on id just be stuck with my work and job. i would have no time to do anything but work. i will push everyone i love away from me for my job. i could have all the money in the world but i will have no one to share it with.

right now i am trying to get a mixture of all thre things in my life. i will study just a bit more then enough. not overloading. if there is a chance for me to have fun i will take it. if people talk shit about me i wont care. but if someone is giving me advice that might help me i will listen.

i am trying to do that. but its just so hard. when someone offers me something i forget that i want all three things. so i then think about the oppisite to what someone is offering me. say someones asking me if i want to go ct. i say no because i have to study. i dont have it in my head, that i want all three. i need to keep remembering it.